Friday 29 March 2013

Dancing With Myself: J. A. KAZIMER interviews J. A. KAZIMER

A couple of free books from me today:
In Loco Parentis UK and US
Mr Suit UK and US
They're both pretty cool.
And Happy Easter everyone.
Writing? Really?

I know, right? Spending your day making shit up. How can that possibly be a job? If only writing was that easy. It takes a lot of time and energy, not to mention a lot of lies. But I wouldn't want to be anything else. Okay, that's a lie too. I'd kill to be a secret agent like 007.

You have a master's degree in Forensic Psychology, so how did you go from that to working as a writer? 

With a master's degree in psychology you really have three options. Option 1) Serial Killer, Option 2) Barista at your local coffee shop and since drinking too much coffee makes me want to stab someone with a swivel straw, I picked option 3) Writer.

I often regret that the worst damage I can do as a writer is give someone a paper cut.
You started by writing crime fiction like The Junkie Tales Dope Sick: A Love Story and SHANK, and now you write demented fairytales. Why? 

TheJunkie Tales (US) , Dope Sick: A Love Story (US) and SHANK (US) were all written right after I stopped being stupid with my life and health and went back to school. I was working on my degree and still working as a private investigator. The content and tone of all those books fit my life and mood at and around that time of transition. All three books probably reflect me as a person more than anything I’ve written since.  

Now my life is very different so my writing reflects that. Plus, killing Cinderella was so oddly satisfying I had to do it again and again with other fairytale legends. 

Do you have any advice for beginning writers? 

Here’s the standard line: Work hard and learn your craft. Beyond that practice being a working writer. Go to conferences. Join critique groups. Learn the ins and outs of publishing. It’s not an easy road. There are over 400,000 books published a year, and that’s not including indie or ebooks books. Make your book stand out. Make yourself standout.

But don’t be dumb about it. Publishing is a very small world, and if you screw (literally and/or figuratively) a publisher/agent/editor, and everyone will know about it.  And if the sex was bad, well, you might as well start teaching MFA students at your local university.

What is your writing routine? 

A tiny fairy sprinkles dust over my keyboard and magic happens. Or so I wish. In truth, I’m a terrible procrastinator. I write rarely, and would rather waste my day on facebook or surfing the web than writing. I can’t wait until I’m rich enough to hire a ghostwriter. 

What are you writing now? 

The answer to your (my) question.

How did you get published? 

I sold my soul to the devil for a book deal and a bag of gummy bears.

Trust me, I have the better end of the deal. 

Can I be in your next book? 

Sure. Why not? I'll make sure to add you to page 57. 

You work a day job? WTF? I thought all author were rich? 

Yeah, right. I figured it out once and I make about 2 cents a day. Even bestselling authors don’t make the big buck you might think. They sure as hell whine like they don’t.

Well, when you get rich, will you buy me _____? 

Of course. I love my fans and would do anything to keep you happy.

Now, can I borrow a couple hundred bucks?

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